Saturday, June 21, 2008

Biblical Submission Part 1

I know that submitting to one's headship, whether it be a husband, supervisor, parent, the Bible, etc. is not popular in today's culture. Despite popular opinions and behaviors, through my own trials and victories I have learned that God's way will always bring abundant blessings and the "world's" way almost always leads to destruction. Even on the few occasions that the world's way doesn't end in destruction, one still misses the abundant blessing of God which ALWAYS overshadows any worldly reward.

I find it very sad that, today, many folks view the Biblical submission of wives as a form of abuse and/or slavery. I often ask myself how could mankind have bought into such a huge lie? When did so many stop reading the Bible? When one reads what God's word has to say about women and wives submitting to their husbands, the virtues of a Godly woman and the rewards of submission and virtue, I find myself asking, "How could any woman not want to be submissive and virtuous?" (I am not talking about eternal rewards, I'm talking about rewards in the here and now while one is still on this earth). Proverbs 31:28-31 tells us, "Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her. Many daughters have done virtuously, but thou excellest them all. Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates." This is only one of many passages that hints at the abundant blessings that await submissive, virtuous wives.

I know many women will attempt to site Ephesians 5:25-31 on how the husband is instructed to love the wife as Christ loved the church and gave His life for it. They then conclude that since their husband doesn't seem to love them in this way, they are then excused from submission or proceed with a "tit for tat" attitude. However, consider for just a moment how you respond to those who don't respect you, don't encourage you, ridicule you, are not loyal to you, are not proud of you, mock you, are resentful of you, rebellious of your position, resistant to your suggestions or ideas, or treat you with scorn. Do you willing and unabashedly love them as Christ loved the church, willing to give your life for it? Giving up your life for that sort of person is pretty difficult to imagine.

Now, let's consider those who carry respect for you, are always encouraging toward you, are more loyal than a country hound dog, have an abundance of pride for your efforts, they are never resentful or rebellious of your position, they listen and carefully consider your ideas and suggestions, they don't make fun of you or treat you with scorn. Wow! to have that sort of respect and admiration - how could you not love someone like that more than you love life? Proverbs 31:11-12 tells us, "The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil. She will do him good and not evil all the days of her life." If wives would stop listening to the lies of this world and begin honoring, our husbands couldn't help but love us they way Christ loved the church. A positive response may take longer from some men than it will from others, but in time, a positive response will come.

There is always the argument that women have fought long and hard for equality. Why would we want to be put back into a position of inferiority? Again, I wonder when was it that we all stopped reading our Bibles? Absolutely nowhere in the Bible does it elude that a woman is inferior to a man. She may be responsible for different tasks and roles, but never is she inferior. I will again point to Proverbs 31:13-27, "She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands. She is like the merchants' ship; she bringeth her food from afar. She riseth also while it is yet night, and giveth meat to her household, and a portion to her maidens. She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the friut of her hands she planteth a vineyard. She girdeth her loins with strength, and strengtheneth her arms. She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night. She layeth her hands to the spindle, and her hands hold the distaff. She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy, She is not afraid of the snow for her household: for all her household are clothed with scarlet. She maketh herself coverings of tapestry; her clothing is silk and purple. Her husband is known in the gates, when he sitteth among the elders of the land. She maketh fine linen, and selleth it; and delivereth girdles unto the merchant. Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness. She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness." From this passage we find that a virtuous and submissive woman is hardworking, has excellent managerial skills, is strong, has good business sense, is kind to others, spiritual, respected, wise and productive. Please, tell me how those qualities are inferior? I've never met a man who didn't strive to achieve the very same qualities.

Again opponents would argue, "But in some areas we are actually equal to men, why would we want to turn back now?" My answer is because the Bible tells us that a virtuous woman is of GREAT worth. Proverbs 31:10, "Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies." Hmm, Wow! Price far above rubies. A virtuous and submissive woman is valuable. Anyone who owns a valuable piece of jewelry takes steps to preserve and protect it. We women are valuable and deserve preservation and protection. There was once a time in history when women were revered as special, unique and worth preserving. We've all heard the old stories of valiant men risking life and limb to protect women. Where has that gone? Today, we have men and women fighting side by side in combat. (please do not confuse my comment with a disrespect for the women who have served or are currently serving in our nation's military - I am eternally grateful to ALL who have served our nation). Yes, women have proven they are just as capable as men, but from society's standpoint, it has only diminished our value. In a crisis situation men no longer shout, "Women and Children FIRST, Women and Children FIRST". For those who live in the south, Hurricane Katrina was a grim reality of "I couldn't let that woman or child go first, if I had, I'd be the one dead now."

I have a desire to be praised by my husband, children and neighbors. I have a desire to be hardworking, a good manager, possess good business sense, respected, strong, kind to others, spiritual, wise and productive. I have a desire to be valuable enough to be preserved and protected. I have a desire to be a godly and virtuous woman as described by the Bible.


  1. TB~
    This is a wonderful post. You know, as much as I don't want to admit it, I was one of those women who were not fond of the whole "submission" thing. I never understood why I should be a door mat to any man (so I thought submission to be.) Even after I married 10 years ago I never fully submitted to my husband and with my worldly thoughts that society helped dupe me into believing, my marriage suffered for it.

    As time went by I started to look more into the true meaning of submission and you know is NOTHING like I thought or how it is portrayed in society. When I am willing to submit Biblically to my husband, things just go more smoothly in our marriage and in our lives. I am not his door mat, in fact I am more than that...I am fully blessed as is my husband.

    You know it really is true, when you follow the LORD'S instruction things will ALWAYS work out for the best and for HIS Glory.

    It also helps to have other godly women that are willing to be examples and speak into your life to help encourage you. I know it has truly helped thank you TB for being one of those special Titus 2 sisters that I can always count on. I love you dearly and respect you highly.

  2. Keeperofthehome,
    Your words bring tears to my eyes. As you well know, I also lived in rebellion regarding God's Word on submitting to my husband. However, because of God's forgiveness, grace and His Word, I have received a second chance and my marriage is better than I ever imagined possible.

    I pray our examples will serve as a testimony and an encouragement to other women. I pray they too will "get sick and tired of being sick and tired" and decide to give God's way a chance.

    I am so thankful the Lord has brought women like you into my life who consistantly encourage me and help hold me accountable. If it weren't for other Godly women, like yourself, I fear I'd still be "sick and tired".

    An abundance thanks to everything you've poured into me. I know the Lord will richly bless the love you so freely share with others.

    With love from your keeper sister ...

  3. Do you ever.miss your freedom? I know is voluntary, its not.really slavery (as you mentioned). Do you miss having choices on what the direction of your own life will go? Does your.husband order you to do anything stupid (not illegal, just.not.sensible)? Do you have.any boundaries, such as will not.obey?

  4. Hi Anonymous,

    Thanks you for the questions. I hope you will take time to read parts 3-4 of this Biblical Submission article & I hope those sections will bring a greater understanding to you that Biblical Submission is not about a husband authoritatively reigning over his wife as the world's lies have taught today's modern woman.

    Biblical Submission is about submitting your will to God's plan and design. Many years ago when I realized that most of the conflict in my marriage was a direct result of my lack of respect and honor of my husband, I also realized that the ONLY way I could ever Biblically submit to Mr.B was by learning to submit to God and His plan for marriage.

    When I chose to become a mother at a very young age, I chose to live my life in such a manor that would be most beneficial to my family. That meant putting aside my selfish and childish ways and putting my family first. It has not always been easy to put my family's needs before my own desires, but 29 years into this I am beginning to see the fruits of my labor and sacrifices. I see Proverbs 31:28-31 is becoming a reality in my life. It says, "Her children rise up and call her blessed; Her husband also, and he praises her; "Many daughters have done well, But you excel them all." Charm is deceitful and beauty is passing, But a woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised. Give her the fruit of her hands, And let her own works praise her in the gates." (NKJV)

    My husband and adult children honor and praise me. I hope to one day hear the Lord tell me many daughters have done well, but I have exceeded them all. I am now old enough and experienced enough to see some of the fruits of my hands and I trust in the Lord that my works will bring Him praise.

    Praying God's abundant blessings on you,


Thank you for taking time to read my blog and leave a comment. I try my best to respond to each one. God Bless You, Mrs.B