Monday, December 31, 2012

Home Alone - Day 9

I am so bad!  I am late with another daily home alone post ... what are we all to do with me?

Day nine was not quite as restful as days 7 & 8.  I left Piper, EJ's puppy, in her puppy playpen in the basement while attending church.  When I arrived home she had figured out how to escape her playpen (I assume she climbed onto the top of her pet crate and jumped over the enclosure).  She had made quite a mess in the  stairwell, mudroom and kitchen.  I scolded her, put her outside and spent about an hour cleaning up after her.  I've also removed her pet crate from the puppy playpen and placed her dogie bed directly on the concrete floor.  We'll see how long it takes her to figure out how to escape now that she doesn't have anything to climb upon.

I am very frustrated with the U.S.Postal service.   The packages I mailed the big boys for Christmas have arrived late or not at all.  We also have a monthly bill that, after 4 weeks, has not been delivered.  JP finally received his gift box - BUT AB and BT have not received theirs.  I spent an entire year making BT's homemade gift, it is not something easily replaced.  I have a very foreboding feeling that both AB and BT's gifts were stolen after being left on door steps.  As inconvenient as it is for the boys, it appears that I will have to require signatures for any future deliveries.  Please don't leave comments about using UPS as an alternative shipping method - Their track record with me is even worse than the U.S. Postal system.  I simply can not understand why I have had so many issues with packages & mail that I send since moving to eastern Montana - regardless of the shipping company I choose.  The common denominator is that all the packages and mail I've had issues with were sent from our local town.  I have not had any issues with items sent from our neighboring town.

My ankle has improved greatly - thank you for your prayers.  The swelling is considerably reduced and I am walking well without much pain.

I recently received a few anonymous questions in the comments section of my article on Biblical Submission. Although I responded in the appropriate comments section I thought I'd also take a few moments to respond in a post.

The questions posted were:
"Do you ever.miss your freedom? I know is voluntary, its not.really slavery (as you mentioned). Do you miss having choices on what the direction of your own life will go? Does your.husband order you to do anything stupid (not illegal, just.not.sensible)? Do you have.any boundaries, such as will not.obey?"

These questions were left in the comment section of Biblical Submission - Part 1.  I hope the inquirer took time to read parts 2-4 in their entirety.  I hope he/she will come to understand that Biblical submission and abuse are NOT synonymous terms.  Biblical Submission is about submitting one's will to God's plan and design for marriage. Many years ago when I realized that most of the conflict in my marriage was a direct result of my lack of respect and honor toward my husband, I also realized that the ONLY way I could ever Biblically submit to Mr.B was by learning to submit to God and His plan for marriage.  

So, question 1. Do I miss my freedom?  
Since I live in a no-fault divorce state, it would be quite easy to leave my marriage if I chose to do so.  Biblical submission does not encompass a husband controlling his wife's comings and goings.  It is about respecting one's husband as the leader of the family.  Biblical submission is about fostering a husband's trust in his wife.  Mr.B is 100% confident in me.  He trusts me because I've NEVER given reason not to.  He is fully confident that only death will separate me from our family.  Thus, there is no reason for me to "miss my freedom" OR for Mr.B to ever be concerned regarding my comings and goings.  Biblical submission relates to my integrity as a person and my consideration towards others.

Question 2.  Do you miss having choices on what the direction of your own life will go?  
I laughed out loud when I read this question.  Why?  Because I've been a mother for almost 29 years.  Mr. B does not nor has he ever controlled my life choices.  Reality check:  if I wanted a different life than the one I have, I should have made different choices 30 years ago.  When I chose to have a family, I chose to always put their needs before my own wants, desires and goals.  When one chooses to have a family, whether that family is just a husband & wife or whether 10 or more children are added to the mix, the husband & wife should be mature enough and responsible enough to put their own selfish and childish desires aside for the needs of the other family members.  If the husband and/or wife are not willing to do so, then they are in great need of repentance before the Lord. This aspect of biblical submission is not about a husband authoritatively directing his wife's life choices. It is about the husband and wife putting the needs of the family before their own wants.  (note:  needs and wants are not synonymous terms)

Questions 3 & 4.  Does your husband ever order you to do anything stupid (not illegal, just not sensible)?  "Do you have any boundaries, such as what orders you will not obey?"
Biblical submission does NOT encompass a husband aggressively reigning over his wife, commanding her here and there.  Biblical submission is about learning to work together as a team.  In our family, Mr.B is the Chief Executive Officer (CEO).  I am the Chief Operating Officer(COO) and, because I am so detailed oriented, I am also the Accountant.  As the CEO, Mr.B, generally sees the big picture.  He sees what direction he'd like our family to go.  As the COO, I am in charge of all the little details to help get us there.  If  a challenge arises that I do not know how to handle OR if my efforts are not achieving the desired results, Mr.B and I work together on finding a solution.  I respect Mr.B, and because I am ALWAYS honest with him, he respects me.  I have no need of worrying about what I will or will not obey because Mr.B is a respectful person who does not order me to do anything, much less something immoral, un-biblical or illegal.  I am Mr.B's closest confidant, best friend and co-captain.  We are a team and without each other our entire family fails.

I sincerely pray that the worldly misconceptions of biblical submission that the women's liberation movement brought us, will be shattered.  Biblical submission is most simply defined as, recognizing that the husband and wife are a team.  The husband is the captain and the wife is the 1st mate.  A well organized ship does not run smoothly with two captains nor with two 1st mates.  Biblical submission allows the husband to take the helm as captain with his wife steadily by his side as 1st mate resulting in smooth sailing for the entire family.

Well that concludes my posts for day 9 on being home alone.  Mr.B and the children are planning to arrive home tomorrow or Wednesday, depending upon road conditions.  Sadly, I will most likely not be able to post daily as my time will be directed toward the cares of my family.  Although I have thoroughly enjoyed these past  10 days of indulging myself, I am looking forward to the return of those I love most.  I only have a few short years left with OG and EJ before they head out to make their own ways like their older brothers.  Then Mr.B and I will be left with nothing to do but annoy each other between visits from grandchildren.

Happy New Year!

1 comment:

  1. Thank you for posting about biblical submission. I know personally when I do as the Lord directs me in this regard, my household is a lot more peaceful and my husband is a lot more happier.


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